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Wednesday, August 17, 2016

All things are NOT Possible. . learning to deal

I have kept my Forward to Happiness blog around, as I was not sure if I was going to delete it or not, buy I have been thinking the focus it has is not something that fits either my http://www.livingfirstedition.com/?m=1 or http://runmyownlife.blogspot.com/?m=1  , as it's focus is on the decision to leave the bad and more towards the good, and, while I personally have found my good, it is a message that needs to keel being said.

This article deals with something I keep see that puts my reality radar on edge.  It is posts that say something to this effect...

"All things are possible, if you believe.."

"I will have what I want, today..."

...and so on.  This is often seen among the religious but is also seen among the business optimists and bloggers.  And...it is false hope that needs to be dispelled.  It is a message that SOUNDS good but in reality is poison, as it enables someone to continue an action of self abuse.

The reality is...ALL thimgs are NOT possible.  If you are paralyzed, you can't run a marathon.  If you are allergic to milk, you can not have milk ice cream.  If you are poor, you cannot expect the lifestyle of a rich that day.  And, you cannot or should not be trying to change anyone else....and this is my focus, here.  Both my fiance and myself are divorced.  We, like most divorced, have experienced what it is like to have fight after fight with someone that did not change. ..that is because PEOPLE DON'T CHANGE.  Further, you should not be trying to change them.  They either love you willingly, or they don't.  If you were able to puppet control them to treat you like you want, all you are doing is controlling and would you like that on yourself?  Also, what value is actions not freely given?

As I am getting older, I am coming to the conclusion that in the choice between fight or flight, there is never a victory in fight.  Even if you "win" all you do is extend the conflict to the future, and you sw ire having to face the conflict, again.  The only true victory is to walk away ...flight...which is a victory to yourself and opens the potential of new outcomes.

Now, there will always be minor coflicts of opinion.  Those can and SHOULD be resolved by conversation and compromise, if both people value the happiness of each other.  However, if it is a systematic conflict of personality, you must consider your own happiness

Sometimes, the most opimiatic choice you can make for yourself, whether it be a relationship, a job, or a running injury, is to accept all things are NOT possible and make choices for a better day and tomorrow.

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