One truth that I have realized over time is that you must learn to live in balance, and I am nearing the best that I can achieve in that area, now. I have written from time to time about how my own life and things that I have read would teach the lesson that in order to live in balance, you must learn to "cheat" yourself in specific areas of your life. I use the word cheat, because that is the word that was used by Andy Stanley in his book, Choosing to Cheat that I read many years ago. While he is an evangelical author, and I now reject some of his teachings; I agree with his main point of that book...that you must CHEAT yourself out of having more in any one area, if you intend to have the peace and happiness of balance.
I was sitting here reflecting on that concept this morning. It began when I was lamenting that I can't dedicate enough time and effort to truly slim down as much as I want, because it would result in more injuries or lack of time for other things. Then, it expanded outward to me lamenting about how I can't fully accomplish ANY goal that I have for myself. I can't have a completely clean and organized house. I can't make fancy meals all the time. I can't earn as much as I would like. I can't dedicate all my time to making book sales work for more than free or sell products online.
I was discussing this with my wife, which we had done from time to time. She is very experienced in not having the physical ability to do all that she wants to do for a while. As I was thinking out loud about how we may not have the ability to do the best in ANY area, we do have a happy life and have the majority of things we want (even if some small form) that we desire for our future.
Then, it hit me. I was focusing on the wrong word. I was focusing on my goals, when I should have been thinking about my comfort. While ...individually.... I am FAILING to reach my goals, I have SUCCEEDED in achieving a comfortable life, and any movement in any area to reach a higher goal would lead me AWAY from that comfortable balance.
There was a movie years ago with Jack Nicholson, Greg Kinnear, and Helen Hunt by the name As Good As It Gets. In the movie, Jack's character is very OCD about things, Helen's is very limited by her life, and Greg's character faces oppression for being gay. They are always struggling to try to make things better, but one of the characters ask in the movie, "What if this is as good as it gets?"
I think that we all need to stop and consider that question. If you are in a toxic environment, you definitely need to leave. However, if your life is difficult but comfortable, maybe...it's just life. Maybe, it's the closest you will ever get to your goals. Maybe...just maybe....you are living your dream and missing it, looking for more.