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Forward to Happiness Radio

Forward to Happiness Radio

Thursday, February 6, 2020

Being Feminine Is Not About Sex

I need to burst a popular bubble.  My being feminine is not about sex, no matter how often that mistaken assumption about trans people is used.  For SOME people, they might be doing it for sex and may not actually be trans.  Those people I would say were never transGENDERED...just gay. 

Gender and sexual attraction are two different things.  I feel I must keep saying this, because it KEEPS being used wrongly by those that are critical to it.  Sexual attraction is related to who you get sexually aroused by...while GENDER relates to the qualities, characteristics, and likes that someone has and which group stereotype is the circle that contains those realities.

This shouldn't be a hard concept to understand.  When a young girl is growing up, she likes soft things, looking pretty, being fun and creative, deep and intellectual thinking, and so on.  And guys....NONE OF THIS IS ABOUT YOU.  They are not doing it, because they want to use it to have sex with a guy.  They are doing it, because they like doing it...just like meat head jocks or hunters that like sports and competition because they like it...and not for the woman they leave at home to go do it.

So, realizing this, why would we assume that when there is a trans person that likes things of another gender and wants to be known by them that it has ANYTHING to do with whom they want for a sexual partner?

I am embracing my feminine side...both feeling comfortable to have found a home of people that share my likes and the ability to BE FEMININE and that being has nothing to do with sex.  Just like other women, I want to do it, because I LIKE HOW IT LOOKS....HOW IT FEELS...and most importantly, because I am not misjudged whenever I am seen.

Consider for a moment what it is like to know that wherever you go as a born male that does not fit in the category that other men are going to ask you about your sports team, ask you how much money you make or what you do, ask you if you do other male oriented things and feeling awkward when you do not.  Imagine what it is like to just be you to women who judge you by how much of a "man" you are, even as they have known from the beginning you were not one and not accepting your femininity as one of the group but an intrusion crossing over the line, because they ARE STILL judging you as a man.

THIS is one reason I have welcomed being more public about it and why I would recommend it for others.  It WILL cause people to see you differently, but that is the start to them applying the correct expectations to you and including you in the groups into which you want to be.  That is why I intend to get more and more feminine...REGARDLESS of whether it means I EVER have sex, again.

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