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Forward to Happiness Radio

Forward to Happiness Radio

Saturday, September 19, 2020

Appropriate Expectations

 I've said, before, that I thought expectations get us into trouble, but it is really INCORRECT expectations that are the problem.  Correct ones are not only normal but SHOULD be demanded.  Problems come when we use INCORRECT expectations, and that is a problem that is VERY often seen in society.

For example, we turn on the television, and we see a reporter, who was quoting a reporter as source, saying something as VERIFIED FACT, when it is really just an opinion of someone that is trained to REPORT on stories.. not trained as a professional in whatever field they care covering.  Similarly, we see politicians talking about science, preachers giving advice on relationships or money, and so on and so forth.  They can definitely be qualified in ONE area, but what qualification does that give them OUTSIDE of their trained area?  The PROBLEM is that we are turning to them with an expectation that does not match their normal area of qualification or job description.

Meanwhile, we are overlooking the areas of expectation that DOES fall within areas of responsibility.  If you are in a relationship, you SHOULD be expected to care for their needs, value their contribution, and try to make them happy, because THAT'S YOUR JOB in that relationship.  If a relationship fails for lack of your contribution in that area, you must accept that in part it died from starvation of that essential participation.  Without those contributions, it isn't really a relationship and has not been one in that time, because you weren't RELATING to them.

Or, perhaps, they ARE doing those things but doing them in a way that you are not designed to receive, or they are not designed to provide what you expect in the areas you are designed to receive.  The problem there is that you didn't make your expectations clear at the beginning, and they didn't get to know you enough to recognize your needs, before the relationship began.  Some people are just not designed to work together.  That is hard to receive at times, and it can make us feel like failures.  However, we cannot be a failure for being our true self.  The FAILURE is when we couple with someone that cannot meet those needs within their personality and are required to become someone else to meet them, and that failure is shared by both parties that begin the venture.

So, if you want to be happy, match your expectations with those that can be and should be able to provide those needs, present a true picture of yourself to let them know what can be expected of you, and be in the moments with them, living your expectations to them and receiving from them what is due.

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