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Sunday, April 10, 2022

It's Not a Sprint

I'm approaching all of my goals much differently than I used to face goals.

For much of my life, I was always being rushed into finding solutions to problems and being pushed into making career and other decisions.  Just to give you a few... when I was last schooling for education, my ex at that time had a post partum psychotic break.  Up until that time, I had been the at home parent.... she was already working in management when I left the military, and my daughter's ADHD was giving the school she was in problems.  They had isolated her, so I took it upon myself to homeschool her for her self esteeem and growth... another thing I was pushed into doing... for that matter, the military was a choice after that ex decided she DIDN'T want to be a manager (and then would get an MBA and start managing while I was in the military).  So.. a lot of imposed situations.  But, back to the point.

So, she was out of commission for her condition, but bills had to be paid.  Teacher jobs froze up, shortly after that, because the economy collapsed in 2008, so teachers that were going to retire.... didn't.  I had to do something, so I schooled for accounting, which would dominate both my career options and living locations for quite some time after that.  It also attracted some people to me that were interested in the money of an accountant, so when I left that (in part to care for their needs) I was left alone.

But, in ALL of that, the decisions were made for others and rushed.  Even moving to Florida was due to the fact that when I got my second divorce I gave up custody to my first ex to make my daughter's experience in the divorce more smooth and steady as I worked out my details, and then I had to move TO Florida to be near her and a part of her life... another decision made for someone else and rushed and IN a locked down society.

So, given the option between getting whatever teacher job I can get now on a temporary certificate in whatever classroom that sent another teacher screaming OR a program that costs a little but takes a year to complete with NORMAL student teaching and full certificate, I like the latter.  The same is true for dating options.  I COULD find someone that is looking for a replacement for their ex or father to their kid that DOESN'T show the kind of attraction, desire, and initiative that makes a relationship.. just to have SOMEONE in my life, or I could just live my life and wait for the right one to come along.

As they say, life is not a sprint but a marathon.  I intend to be living for many decades to come, and I don't need or want to make quick decisions for either jobs or relationships that will make those years any less special than they should be.

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