I felt that this year was going to be the beginning of a new phase for me at the beginning of the year. I didn't know all of how that would be the case, but I think that one of them is that my life is becoming EASIER and the path smoother. I was noting to my daughter this weekend that that has almost never been the case in my life.
It was always a challenge.. I mean, it was medical bills leading to bankruptcy with each child, since we didn't have health coverage or it was my daughter having pneumonia or my 2nd wife's ex suing us after I got a job to pay bills and dragging us back in poverty near him or my 1st wife having a post partum break leading me to care for our infant and her while schooling for a better paying job or etc or etc. It was always something.
Indeed, two years ago, I was planning my move here after my ex wife had decided to divorce me, and I had given custody of my daughter back to my 1st wife for stability in her life. I was trying to move to Florida to be near her in the pandemic shut downs with little money. I would come here without job and work ubereats to pay bills and for the next couple years be very unstable with finances and not really knowing what career I would have. There were many periods in those years of not knowing if I would have the money for rent that week. When I defend poverty aid, it is out of not only this but other experience in it.
However, as I was noting to my daughter, I don't have to rush into whatever teaching job I can get. I can take my time and do this year long program. I have the aid to cover expenses in that time. After it, I will be able to get into a full teaching position with a full certification, which will pay well and be something that I like to do. It just gets better from there.
So... there is no more need to run on adrenaline and fight my way, and that is a VERY different reality than I have faced for a long time, and it will take some time to adjust. But, I am looking forward to a very happy life ahead.