I missed a day in my plan to do one thing I like about me each day for 10 days, again. So, I am going to be doing two days in this post... day 4 and day 5.
Courage
So, for day 4 I wanted to say that I like that I have courage. As someone that was born and lived most of my life as a somewhat shy introvert, it was something I had to struggle to overcome... both to have the will to do something instead of feeling it was all up to fate AND to actually DO something or SAY something, when I knew what I wanted. I will deal with each of those individually.
When you are born in a poor household with glasses and other limitations, you very easily adopt a mentality that life is pre-destined or fated. There are many that hold this belief in certain political circles, right now.... that some are destined to be at the top or the bottom based on where and when they are born. It can be a hard thing to overcome. Then, Christian faith comes in and gives them reasons to believe that... that its all happening according to God's plan. I could literally write a book on why this is a dangerously false belief, but I will attempt to summarize a response, here. Having studied the bible in detail in college, I can tell you that the message of God was NEVER that the "good" people will be blessed and the bad people will struggle, despite prosperity preachers saying that very thing. Indeed, it is quite the opposite in Biblical history and Jesus teachings. Jesus said that his followers would face persecution, and throughout the middle ages the book published more than the bible was Foxes Book of Martyrs, listing all of the believers that died horrible deaths, including all but one of Jesus' own apostles. The man that wrote the Purpose Driven Life had his own son die from suicide, and there is no one that escapes the same struggles that are common to all man. So, the point for this blog post is that struggle is not a born curse of any group in which they must remain. Anyone can ACT to change things in their life, but that takes COURAGE.
I'm happy to say that I have acted in courage to meet my challenges, through most of my life. I have always believed that you can change things, or "why should we even get out of bed in the morning," as Sara's friend says in Serendipity, and she says it's to make mistakes and learn from them. I have DEFINITELY made a lot of mistakes, and I HOPE I am learning from them, as I keep moving forward. But, the very fact that I CAN learn from them and change is evidence that life is not fixed... you are not fixed to live a set life without any input from yourself. I also feel that my age has allowed me to take more risks and make more mistakes and learn more things, as you reach a point in life where you care less "what other people say" as a song says in my most recent playlist.
Independence.
For day 5, my choice of what I like about myself is independence. Yeah.. go ahead.. say I'm a typical Sagittarius... wild and free, but I do want stability and security. But, I don't chose to get it by just going along with what others say. I've always valued people that are real, and I respect many of my real friends' opinions, even if different than my own, as long as they are basing those opinions on their own reasoning and not what others told them to believe. I believe in and practice making up my own mind about things, and that means that I have opinions that coincide with those in many different political groups, but I also disagree with many of those opinions of groups and that causes most in those groups to reject me.
I also have a strong training in the Bible and experience in the church, but I have seen HUGE flaws in the church and see the Bible out of the context of Love, which is God's being. I've also seen how Christianity shares beliefs with many of other religions or those with no religion at all. We have more in common than separates us, and I have been trying to push people TOGETHER in a world that separates for years, now. That said, I don't want them to adopt each other's beliefs and give up their own... just respect each other, like I do to all of them.
The Declaration of Independence at our nation's founding voiced that people should not seek to leave things for minor reasons, but that when there is a steady and strong history of control and disrespect that people should be free to leave that association.. and thus why I have done many July 4th posts about how that applies to divorce in years past. You have to find your people that respect your being for yourself, and not everyone will fit that bill. If you settle in THAT area, you will eventually find yourself not respected or admired for being yourself in something you are now obliged for life. That's why it is important to take your time dating, be willing to say no and walk away, and have the courage (see day 4) to walk away if you made a mistake, based on the other showing false pretenses.
So, I value both my courage and my independence, even if those can often ruffle feathers and keep me single, longer.
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