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Deep Calleth to Deep

 "Deep calls to deep..." Psalm 42:7

There are many stages and steps after a breakup.  In following mine, I will be saying nothing negative about her for several reasons, but I will be speaking about myself and my thoughts and feelings on breakups and restarts in general.  I was holding off doing so in part because I felt that being MYSELF must have led to this end.  So, doubting myself I withdrew for a while.  However, especially in the past few days, I have begun to realize how dumb that would be.  

It was a lesson I learned many years ago in context of other ended relationships or dating attempts, and I had forgotten it, til now.  Basically, someone's inability to appreciate the actions, manners, and qualities that make you.. you.. is not a reflection on you but on them.  I do not mean that in a negative way.  What I mean is that it only reveals that if they cannot appreciate you for being you, you would feel always like you had to change to be something that they can appreciate, and very likely I am certain that the feeling is true in reverse as relates to them feeling how they have to be for me.  Further, it would lead to both feeling the other is failing to appreciate them, when the other is simply being themselves.

So, there is no reason to hide myself, especially after someone fails to appreciate it.  Why would I change who I am, now... when I am on my own?  I am a deep person.  That's who I have always been.  I write deep blogs, ponder concepts and emotions and life.  I write emotional texts and poems and pick emotional songs.  That's what i do.  Like many of the musicians of the day, I expresss myself in text and texts and more.  I capture beauty in photos. I watch emotional movies and shows and cry at times or celebrate in joy.  I am by nature a deep person, and to limit that and curl up into a shell would be to eliminate ME.

In the LGBTQ communities, they promote pride in being yourself, and I think that is a very good message.  However, it is not limited to their groups, alone.  Everyone should love themselves for being themselves.  It was part of a prior post I did about relationships, in fact... where I said you should love them, love yourself, and love your unity.  I do have to admit upon reflection that I gave up quite a bit of myself in the attempt, because those things were not applicable or good for the union.  But, now, I am going back and reclaiming those things that were lost.

So, love yourself.  I started to say love yourself, til someone else chooses you for you.  But, that doesn't matter and shouldn't change anything.  Love yourself, ETERNALLY.  Others will do what they will do.  The saying is that a person is the sum of the 5 closest people to them, which is why breakups can take adjustment to recenter yourself.  However, if you have a solid love of yourself, then you can be one of the 5, and that will help you carry on and grow, afterwards. 

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