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Forward to Happiness Radio

Forward to Happiness Radio

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Saturday, July 18, 2020

Suspending Booty Financial/ Forward to Happiness .. Reviving

This is the first of two posts I will do, tonight.


I am suspending posts to both and for different reasons.  I will maintain them for future use...maybe.  However, I do not believe EITHER are applicable to this year or likely next year.  I'll explain why.

As relates to BootyFinancial, it was started with the intent to support the little guy and to help him get money in world of corporate greed.  However, I have seen a movement this year that is most akin to the Russian revolution, before the establishment of the Communist state in Russia.  Groups of young hotheads are shouting give me MINE..MINE...MINE, without work.  They see WORK, in fact, as the enemy. 

So, everyone is shouting for a government handout, without any personal risk or sacrifice of sweat.  I not only do not agree, but I see that as the precipice to having no industry and no economy FOR jobs, and the end of that is high unemployment, huge debt, and a populace that refuses to do anything that is hard.  The last time the population rose up against corporations, we had the Great Depression, and that was followed by the protestors families being poor for generations, while big business got bigger.  That will happen, again.

I am ending Forward to Happiness, because I no longer believe in Happiness as a destination or a lifegoal.  I believe you should make your life as happy as you can, but you need to be prepared for life to suck...especially as the above takes place.  You need to look out for you, and to have as happy of a life as possible, you need MONEY.  The only ones not suffering right now and the ones living happy are those that own their house and had a savings.  That's a fact, and I'd say they won the argument about whether money buys happiness.

So, my new blog that will be profile link will be the one I had before coming back to this..., which is one setup in my name about my own business interests.  As I am divorcing and focusing on my own life IN my personal life, my blogging should be the same.

Wednesday, July 15, 2020

Hold Your Head Up

Today, I was out or a walk, and I started up a hill.  I always get out of breath and tired walking up this hill, and I often wonder why.  I mean... I think about the physics of it.  It is just putting one foot in front of another, just like walking other sections.  It rises, but it shouldn't be that big of a difference.    Then, I had a thought that fixed it, and it inspired a theme that I think applies to life, as well.  I held my head up and walked up the hill leaning slightly backwards, and I had no problems at all.

You see.. when we put our head down in a walk, we are cutting off our lung capacity, and we are putting strain on other muscles that are not used to do the walking or running, regularly.  When we go up a hill, we have a natural tendency to lean forward and put our head down to be vertical, and that causes the problem.

As I reflected on this, I realized that I have been holding my head down, after all of the things that have happened in my life, and the same advice was very good advice for me, now.  When I look down in depression, it is taking my eyes off the future and putting my focus on things that are not used for moving in that direction.  I wear down from the strain of that diverted focus, and it slows my progress, which is evident by time wasted in that thought that COULD be used to move forward, instead.

So, I would suggest to everyone that is facing a trial, whatever trial it may be, to follow this advice.  Keep your eyes on your forward destination, and do not let your natural instincts to recoil or be distracted take over.  Straighten your back and let your legs of activity push you forward out of the zone that is causing the pain.  You will get to a better place with the confidence of knowing you can make it, instead of letting someone or something that is not on your side steal your progress and your prosperity without them.

Tuesday, July 14, 2020

Accepting Age - Time to Slow Down

I'm sitting here this mornng thinking about my life and thinking that any future jobs I take from here forward needs to be flexible and more relaxed.  Why?  I'm reaching my ending point at 48 years old.

Did you know that the maximum age by law that anyone can join the military is 42?  Why do you think that is....they know that as you get older, you become less physically able.  Indeed, I hurt upon waking, every day that followed a day of grocery shopping or mowing or any simple physical activity.  I used to run 5 miles, and I am good to get 1-2, nowadays.  Where I used to keep the weight off easily, it now sticks around even with activity.  My body knows it is time to slow down.

Then, there is the stress level I have endured over my life, stress that you would need to combine multiple average people's whole lives to equal.  I have lived though decades of debt and bankruptcy, moving over 10 times, having to find a new job more times than that, having to homeschool my first highly ADHD daughter for 7 years, during which time I raised my youngest by myself, after my wife at the time had a post partum psychotic break.  During THAT time having to finish my degree while doing it to get financial aid to pay bills.  I would end up having to divorce that wife and relocate across the country.

I endured my car being stolen, my family breaking into my house, my work putting the work load of 4 on me (replaced me with 4 people) and then hurting my chances for a new job upon leaving with deceptive reviews, multiple romantic rejections, my extended family rejecting me, etc.

Then, there is the current situation where I invested 5 years of my life, my house, my back breaking work to get money and groceries for a family that would in the end reject me and leave me literally penniless but having to reside in her house for at least 10 month after being rejected, as she had drained my bank accounts and assets.

So... yeah.  It's time to retire.

I no longer believe in careers, corporations, or romantic relationships.  I awake tired and sore, daily, and I now have high blood pressure after this last marriage.  So, my stress capacity is lower to handle challenges, as well.  All to say, I wouldn't be that great of a benefit for a company or a relationship, anyway.  It is time that I call it quits and slow down.

So, I will be working just hard enough to pay for my ability to live, and otherwise accept the reality that my best days are behind me and were taken by others that are no longer in my life....let that be a lesson to others who are sacrificing their lives for others, as well.

Sunday, July 12, 2020

Defining My Happiness

This is going to be more limited to my personal life, because it is my blog, and I can.

As I talk about moving forward to happiness, I am a direct application of my lessons and am living my experience on my personal journey.  I have experience in the past and present of having to be in a toxic situation from which I need to escape.  Even this week, I spent a lot of time walking for food, caring for a dog, installing AC units in rooms, washing family dishes, cleaning rooms, and more for a household and family that has rejected me.  Last fall, my wife told me she didn't want to be in a relationship, anymore, after I had invested a lot of money, time, and stress into the relationship.  However, her back was having major issues, and I knew that she was unable to pay for the bills of the house or rent or etc without me there. 

Further, I had invested all that money, so I no longer had a house into which to move.  So, I have spent the last 8 months doing things in a place I am unwelcome at my expense and moving me further away from my own goals.  Even as I type, she is in there watching TV on a tv that I bought with my money with her kids in an AC room, while my daughter is a thousand miles away, and my room has no cold air. She is also stress free, having received an SBA loan for 4 thousand dollars, which I cannot use, while mine was delayed BECAUSE OF HERS I learned, today.

So, I have plenty of reason to want to leave just to leave the NEGATIVE situation, but since it is entirely possible I could end up being here for up to 6 months to earn enough money, I must continue to live in this situation.  Further, I don't want to be negative all the time, pointing backwards to this horrible situation I am forced to endure..

So, I want to focus ahead, and I am thinking today that I need to identify the good that I will be going to....what IS it that I want to have, and who is the person that I want to become.

So, a little about me.

I am a sensitive guy, and that has always got me into trouble, because women WANT TO LIKE a sensitive guy and that has led me into many dates, relationships, and marriages.  However, they don't want to FCK a sensitive guy, and they don't see someone caring for them as attractive but as an invasion into their territory or at best as a friend.  Society has a term for this...friend zone.  What that really means is guys that they lure and burn...over and over .. but don't want them to be upset about it.

So one thing that I would like, if I was going to pretend my happy place, would be a woman that doesn't see a stereotypical male when she looks at me and imposes that view upon me, regardless of what she knows about me.  She sees me for the real me, and she enjoys those parts of me.  She would tell me that she likes me, sneak kisses, touch me with passion, leave me notes of affection, and just ask how my day went and try to make it better.  I have yet to have that as a reality in my life.

I would like to be rewarded for my efforts.  Meaning, I would like others to acknowledge when I do things for them with gratitude or payment, instead of my giving both work AND my money to effect PAYING to work for them.  While you do get paid at workplaces, you often do not get the acknowledgement or the gratitude.  Instead, my experience in work places is being criticized by those for which you provided effort.

I would like to be in my children's lives.  This Fall, my daughter starts performing in band at her school in Florida.  I would really like to be able to be present and film her and remember those moments, while I can.

I am a spiritual person.  In the past, I completed a Bible degree at a college and have worked in churches.  However, as I am diverse and tolerant, I often found myself excluded from the groups and their care.  So, I would like to be a part of a religious group that SAW ME and even if they didn't agree could set that aside and include me.

I like nature.  Whether it be sitting in a forest and listening to the wind blowing tree branches or laying on a beach listening to the waves, there is something about that that takes me away and connects me with everything.  Indeed, I like to meditate, and I believe I am a Christian witch, because I believe in the energy of God in nature and feel him/her in me.  So, maybe that group would be a witch group in Florida.

I like music.  Whether it be creating a radio station or listening to music as I run, I get energy by that music, so it would be a part of whatever future I hold.

I like the arts.  I really discovered how much I like watching ballet and the arts this last decade....with my wife that I now think was happy to just have me as a girl friend in her life at those events.

Yes...I know that it sounds like I am gay, and I am open to that potential, but I need time to explore that, and that is something I CANNOT DO IN THIS HOUSE.

I like earning money and investing it and planning for my future.  I can start doing that, now, since even if I must be here I can invest everything I make, until I go, because....if it is her house, I wouldn't be expected to pay the utilities or rent.  That's HER bill, now.

Well, I think I might be able to turn the AC on and go back down to my little room cell, soon.  But, I wanted to give you a picture of me and where I am going.