What We Can Learn from the Temptations of Jesus

I knew that this blog post was coming for several days, but I didn't feel it was right, til now.

In the Gospel stories, Jesus was tempted by Satan with three temptations, and I think they are important for reflection in thinking about life, whether or not you are religious or even believe.

First, I have not note one thing, because it is something I have said for a long time.  You have this story in the Gospel because God was not only allowing this trial but was using Satan for the trial.  It was a part of his plan, indeed a part that was important enough to write down so others can learn from it.  I'll just leave that right there.

Ok, the first of the trials that Jesus was faced with in the gospel story was being tempted to use his Divine power to turn rocks into bread after not eating for a long time.  I want you to notice something.  He DID have the power, and he COULD legitimately do what was asked.  It wouldn't have made Him any less Divine.  It would not have been a sin for Him to do it.  But, He refused to use Divine power to provide what He wanted like it was some magic trick.  Holiness isn't about manipulating God to give you what you desire.  I don't pray like that.  I will earn my kids trust and respect, just like I work for other things in my life.  And, sometimes you need to face fear and struggle and grow to come out the other side.

Next, He was tempted to throw Himself off the temple and let God catch Him.  This certainly would have established to those watching what He really was, but again He chose not to use God to establish His popularity and authority.  Indeed, one thing that I have discovered in life is that being rejected and lowly is one of the best ways to talk to others rejected and lowly, because they know you understand their story.

Finally, He was offered the kingdoms of the world, if he worshiped Satan.  Again, if Satan wasn't able to provide that, it wouldn't have been a temptation.  God had given him that authority, just as Jesus told the Roman leader that his power came from God to kill him.  Yet, Jesus purpose wasn't being worshiped  I said in a comment to one of my posts, recently, that God is less concerned with being seen as right than that He can be with us in our pain, and I believe that is true.  Worship can often get in the way of connection, and I don't want to be worshiped by anyone or put on a pedastal.  I am just as flawed as anyone, but maybe.. maybe I can help someone else.  And, that is the purpose of this blog.

I hope you have a good weekend.

The God that Hears

I've had a continuous relationship with God over my life.  That doesn't mean I've always thought God was worthy or that God was right.  I still have my doubts about both, but God hasn't ever had a problem with my questioning..  those problems usually came from men.  But, I think it is a Divine quality to allow others to struggle in the places where struggle is important to growth and not take it personally.  Plus, I think it is a Divine quality to question things.  My own kids have questioned me at times, and I don't think that is a bad thing.  As I said about one of them one time, if they are strong enough to question ME, they are going to be ok in life.

But, I did use to question God a lot and sometimes I felt angry at God.  None of that means I didn't have a relationship with God.  True relationships allow for true conflict.  God and the devil have a very old relationship, as well as other divine figures that walk independently.  But, I use to cast a lot of anger at God for what happened to me in life, presuming that God was responsible.  We get that idea that God is responsible by attributing to him the concept of Providence and believing that all things are being directed by him for our good.  But, I watch 5 people run red lights every single week.  People do not follow Divine direction, nor does things like disease, bacteria, or our own choices or the choices of others.  So, how can I hold God responsible for the freedom of others, unless I want God to take away all freedom, which I do not want.

But, as I swayed and screamed and acted out, I not only found that God was patient but that He LISTENED... not that he was waiting around for us to figure it out but actually HEARD me, because he cared enough to pay attention and offer care and consolation in the middle of it all.

So, this post is not to say to go church, because honestly I don't want to play roulette with whether you go to a good one or one that will take advantage of your pain to their own ends.  I don't want to involve religion at all.  But, I will say.. from my own experience.. that God is there and is listening, whenever you want to talk, and sometimes, that may be all you need.

Charity

Charity is not about feeling superior.  It is not about getting enough back for what you give in return.  It is not about getting recognition for your organization or your faith or your family or whatever else there would be as your "side" or "people".. It is about need and a heart that cannot see a need without wanting to help.

I won't go into details, as I am making a choice to keep those details out of my social media or blog posts, but there is a reason that I am the age that I am without a huge savings.  In most of my life, I walked from helping one person in need to another... or multiple.  In almost all of those cases, I would find myself in time on my own, and often when my own need arose I would find myself without similar giving hands.  

However... does that mean that I regret what I did or gave?  Not in the slightest, because my choice to give was never based in what I received.  It was based in having love enough to give to someone that didn't deserve the fate they had been given or had a physical, psychological, or financial need.  Whether my giving was acknowledged with gratitude or would be seen by others as an attempt to control was beyond my ability to predict or manage and had NOTHING to do with the value of the giving.

At different times in my life, I have worked in non profits in a customer facing role.. not really one I am in currently, but I have been in that role.  I found that when you did things to help those in need, you were met oftentimes with anger and shame by the one receiving it.  I understand.  There have been times in my life that for different reasons I had to live on state benefits, and it took a lot of pride swallowing to accept the help.  This is routinely an adult reaction, as I have heard children cheer that they would have a meal, tomorrow.  But, to the adult, feeling like you have to rely on someone else can be an offensive thing and the giver a burden.

However... again.. does that mean that the giving should not be done?  No.  I recently read a meme that said what you give may not always be given back to you, but it will always be a reflection of how YOU are.  I'd say that I want to be a good person and do that, but the reality is that I know I am NOT always a good person.... and YET I still want to do that, partially because I know what it is like to live in shame and rejection and need.

Charity isn't about you or your organization or your reward or your acceptance.  It isn't about buying a ticket into heaven, and it isn't about paying for your sings.  It has nothing to do with YOU at all, other than simply... do you care enough to give.  And, that... these days.. is a lot more relevant question than it should be. 

A Life of Love

As I look back over my life, I have a different perspective, lately, than I have at times in the past.  In the past, I would look at the many periods of pain that I faced in one situation or another... but lately my focus has been more upon love in its many forms and results.  I am grateful for living a life that has contained so much love over the years, regardless of the pains that might have resulted as well.

I had the wonderful experience of being able to be very present and involved in the lives of my children in most of their upbringing.  It made such a mark upon my heart that it was hard for me to think I could be happy, after they had grown and gone.  I know many struggle with this, ,as well.  However, it is possible to have happiness in your life apart from your children, and it is important to remember that just because they are no longer present and those moments are past, they are fixed in time... you have a memory of love to with them, which is much more than many can say.

My relationship with my dad grew from rocky beginnings to much better by the time that he died of cancer.  That was over 20 years ago, but I treasure the memories of the times that I had with him, as I also treasure the memories in the past and the times in the present that I can spend with my mom and sister and other family members.

I was a youth director at my church for a couple years in high school and college age, and I still get to remember the impact that those kids had on me and me on them.  I remember other times of ministry to help people over the years in many ways.. most not present in a church... sometimes in unnoticed ways to help others, simply because I knew that they needed it.. even if it was something as simple as having a conversation with someone that I knew was struggling and needed an open year and a caring heart.  I am not sure how high that number would be of people I helped in conversations, but it would be in the many dozens.  I have written books and blog posts to help people, as I am with this one, as well, and I don't do it for money or fame.  I do it, because I want to help people to navigate life in a way that would lead them out of dark times and into more happy days.  And, I currently work in a non profit organization that helps people that are homeless and in need, and I remember that each day that the stress from the workload hits a high point.

My life of love has not been a life of joy.  It has been a life of living where the rubber hits the road and is driven by my heart for others.  It has not always been wise, but I am remembered of the cadet maxim..

"Risk more than others think is safe. Care more than others think is wise. Dream more than others think is practical. Expect more than others think is possible."

I'd simply counter that to say that it must be married to grace, if it is to be sustainable.  So, the next time that you think your life is void of love, take a look around you at the impact you have had on others and remember the impact others have had on you.  You might find that you have a life of love, as well. 

Dark Chronicles Act 17: A "Lazy" Poor Testimony of Care

Despite the fact that I shouldn't have to do this post, it is becoming more and more apparent that I must.  It shouldn't be necessary, because people should have enough sense and experience to see otherwise, but sense seems limited and experience only serves to exclude the wise from the inexperienced's echo chambers.  As such, this must be a Dark Chronicles post, as well.. even though it really should not be.

When it first began to circulate, I thought that it wasn't worth refuting, because I didn't believe that anyone would buy into it.  But, preachers and rich politicians kept repeating the same fallacy... if someone was poor, they were choosing to be poor, because they were lazy.  And, so.. the mythology grew and grew.  Now, we find ourselves in a state of government affairs that the fallacy is literally affecting the life AND DEATH of many millions of families.  So, I must speak out.  On what grounds can I speak out?  I have lived much of my life as one of those "lazy" poor, and I think it is high time that I told you how I was made poor and what it meant for others.. so I will give a few examples from my own life.

A long time ago, after I had left the military and was homeschooling an ADHD child at the suggestion of her school, my wife at the time had the first of several post partum psychotic breaks with the birth of our second child.   My ex wife of that time was the primary earner with my support, so when that happened we were left without any money, a disabled adult, and a baby to raise.  So, for the next few years, I would make things work by borrowing over with my student loans over tuition to cover living expenses for graduate schooling, while I did all the child rearing and household duties.  There was no income other than student loans, which left me with a huge student loan debt to cover.  So, for that decade, I was not working, yet both my children benefited from my activities, as well as my ex wife.

Later, I would be a single dad that was trying to make things work, raising both of my kids, after another of my ex's mental breaks.  In order to do so, I had to pay for after school daycare, during the time that I worked, and I was paying for my older child's college expenses, as she had failed out of college and needed to get good grades to get back her aid.. which ultimately would be accomplished.  So, I was being financially tapped out, but .. again.. both of my children benefited from the sacrifices.

There have been other periods of my life.. both single and in relationships.. where I was living on food stamps, due to being between jobs or dealing with life and health challenges, as well.  Indeed, for a long while after both of my children, I was poor while paying for the expenses that came from having the BABY.   

But, it's not always acts of sacrifice for others.  Sometimes, it can just be a bad turn of health or luck.  I have faced health challenges at times.  I would spend over 6 months not being able to work full time, due to having multiple retina eye surgeries and recovery time.  In that time, I had to not only not work but tap out retirement plans and sell things just to pay for food and bills... and not all of my bills was covered in that time, leading to credit challenges to overcome, later as well.

My story is not exceptional.  It is common.  The poor are not poor by choice.  I remember just how hard it was to swallow my pride to seek food stamp benefits, the first time.  Many facing health challenges feel like they are broken and a failure... simply for being in need.  And, it is at THIS point that others that do not face their challenges judge them, call them lazy, and cut off their funding.  I don't blame them for their anger in this time for this reality.  Countless kings have lost their heads... literally.. for similar acts of lack of empathy.  Though, I would call for the poor to be patient.  All they are doing it defining themselves, so let them.  The poor vote, and the seeds they are sowing will come to fruit, soon enough.

I hope that my story will cause a few to rethink the narrative that they are being fed, though I am experienced enough to know that it will probably be ignored by those that feel unaffected and want to fit into their groups.  Just know.. you are living on fiction, not fact.  Others around you have needs, and if you are not helping those in need, you really have no business deciding whether others can do so, as well. 

We Are Not the Same

 Given the subject line, this requires a disclaimer.  I do not mean that we are not the same by race, gender, or other demographic measure.  In those areas, we are equal.  However, we are not the same.

My experience of my life is that people are not all the same.  We all have the same opportunity to become worthy.  However, all do not take it.  Some will rise to the occassion as he says in Mr Magorium's Wonder Emporium to become the best version of themselves.  Others will resort to their base programming or choices.  However, all will define themselves by their actions.

Some will value others.  Some will value themselves.  Some will look to elevate others.  Some will elevate themselves.  Some will look to accuse blame.  Some will assume blame to clear others.  However, all will act differently based upon their nature.  And, all should not be treated as equal in the response.

In our age of equality, we like to say that all are equal.  That is true for demographic measures.  However, if I'm in a restaraunt and the waitress does an exceptional job, I'm going to give them a bigger tip.  Not everyone gives the same effort or attention to detail.  Those that do, deserve a bigger reward.

So.. this is a little post, simply to say that we are not all the same.  Some actually deserve a response, while other deserve exclusion.