Fly

Lunch time blog post to touch on and expand something I said on social media a few dys ago.

A couple years ago, I left Florida to come to Oklahoma, and a big part of why that was at the time was that I had just gone through two big eye operations, each requiring a month of face down time following, and had gone through it alone.  I felt like that should change, so I took a job offer that was closer to my mom and sister.  

Yet, upon reflecting on that the other day, I realize that first of all I DID go through that in Florida and made it all work just fine by trasfering money, arranging for grocery deliveries, applying my own eye drops, and more.  Further, I realize that upon getting here, I have STILL been taking care of my own needs for the most part... as well as providing to help the needs of others.  From a care taking perspective, where I am now is not that different from where I was living in Florida.

I don't say that to say ... woe is me that no one is caring for me.  I am actually concluding the reverse.  I hesitate to assign the steps that led me to this conclusion to God, so I will just say the universe or circumstances.  But, lets consider how nature teaches the young.  An older lion will let the younger learn to hunt.  A mother bird will kick the young out of the nest to learn to fly.  Nature doesn't cradle those learning but expects them to ... learn.. and believe that they can do it.

It is not till you have to rely on the strength of your own wings that you learn to have peace in your ability.  So, the universe was looking at me feeling broken and unable after the eye surgeries and rather than allowing me a soft place to fall and people to look after me I was given challenge after challenge.  Even on the road to get here I had to repair the car twice.  Then, once here, I was pushed out of my government job by Trump cuts and had to find new work and work hard at it.  And, I rose to the ocassion.  Each time there as a new challenge, I was forced to rely upon myself for funding, comfort, recovery, inspiration, care, and to develop boundaries to look out for myself.  Now, I have no doubt, as I used not to have any doubt, that I am able, all by myself, to not only survive life but thrive.  And, I will carry that knowledge and ability into every new challenge that faces me in the days and months to come.

Flying Blind

A quick lunch break blog post.

There was a flight school that I considered decades ago that had a black cat and number 13 on their planes.  Their point was to say that it's not about luck but training, instruments and reason.  

In movies, you'll see astronauts that fly by paying attention to their instruments and trusting their course.  It's like pilots of planes that fly at night.  Neither are flying by sight outside their craft.  They don't need to do so.  They trust what they know and what they know has nothing to do with sight or feelings.  Recently, I've come to appreciate the need to do that more in life.  

It is easy to be led to make rash decisions under the influence of emotions.  While there is a place for adrenaline at times, I have learned that a lot of times we need to just step away for a moment, take a deep breath, and repeat what you know and make decisions on that.  That's not just true to avoid decisions based on fear but on false hope.  Hope is good, but it has to be based on real potential or is just delusional.

So, whatever you are doing or however you are guiding your life, don't do so flying by sight or emotions.  You know what you need to do to get to where you want, given the information given to you.  If that information changes, you can change your plans.  But, absent that, continue forward, trusting your will and your skill to get you where you want to go.

Loving Your Improvement

I was looking over an old post of mine recently where I was talking about the debate of the question of can people change.  In it, I noted that people say God doesn't change, yet you see different types of expression from him, depending on the situation.  I noted that it didn't mean that God had changed but that just like us how we respond may change to different people and in different situations.  I don't mean that to sound critical, because it is not always the case that someone is less worthy to get a different reaction or expression.  As we are human, sometimes our change of expression can be caused by something like being hungry or stressed or having a loved one facing medical issues or more.  However, that was the focus of that post, and this one only touches on the concept to go in a different direction.

In that post, however, I noted that part of my reason for feeling that people can change is that I have changed over the many decades of my life, as has my opinions, my body, and more.  It is the same person....  my soul didn't leave my body... however, I changed over time when new information came into me to process or when I was affected by being in different environments or had a different diet or exercise routine.  For example, for a while now I have been engaged in fitness and correcting my overall diet.  That has changed my body.

Now, here I need to change one thing I have said in the past.. again because of my learning from experience.  It isn't a change, but it is more like a counter to fully complete the concept.  I have said that growth is hard and that no one likes to exercise but likes the result.  Overall, that is true.  However, it is possible to learn to LOVE it, as well.

I saw a meme recently that talked about how choices become habits and habits become identity.  I think there were a few more steps in there, but it is applicable here.  I made the choice to keep going out and doing fitness, even when I didn't feel like it or the weather wasn't great or such.  That discipline led to big fitness leaps.  It also made me fall in love with self improvement.  I realized that I cannot change a lot in the world, but I can always improve myself.  Now, I love the opportunity for improvement, and I give myself challenges to reach to become the best that I can possibly be.  I am working towards running a half marathon, next year, right now.  But, I want to improve in all areas of my life.  I think everyone, no matter how good, can always identify something in which they are deficient or weak and improve it.

So, that is my challenge for you, this week.  What do you have that you can improve?  Then, start establishing a discipline of habits that will make you love your improvement and lead to a greater version of yourself... not for others but for you.  I will cheer you as you courageously rise up to meet that task.

Don't Curse the Wind

Can you imagine someone standing in a boat without sailes cursing the wind for blowing?  Our immediate reaction is to say... that's not how boats work.  You are right?  They build sails to let the wind carry them forward, with the ability to steer it with the rudder.

Yes, I do know that people can build a motor and put it on a boat and go wherever they want to go, but that requires extra power at every step that will literally cost you to do it, and I am simply using the boat as a nature analogy... so to continue.

Wind doesn't have it in for you.  It is just wind.  You happen to be in it.  Nature is nature.  I remember a time when I was over on the ultra religious side that I would be reciting bible verses like spells to try to stop the rain from coming.  It never even dawned on me at the time how arrogant that happened to be... thinking I was so important that the universe should bend to my own will, when there was things like need for rain for plants or cooling of the earth or more.  Life is not just about you.

But, you are in the Earth and a part of the Earth.  You bend to the universal song that cycles through truths, not desired storylines.  There is a beauty in becoming part of that song and listening to it and learning from it, as much as receiving from it.

So, this weekend, I suggest you slow down, listen to the universe and enjoy the path you are on, even if you have not yet arrived at a desired destination.  I find, there is something to learn and ways to grow, every single day of that path.  So, I plan to slow down and listen a little more this weekend.

First Edition

A very long time ago, one of my first self published devotionals had the preface that focused on being a first edition in the world.  I want to revive that concept in this blog post.

There are so many copies in the world, today.  Not just copies, they are copies of copies of copies and so on.  If you have ever had to make a copy of a copy, you will know that with each copy you lose a little of the quality.  It's like the phone game where people spread a message along from one person to another in a whisper, only to have the final message be nothing like the original message at all.  That is a very good analysis of gossip in the world, today, as well.

The point being, copies lose quality much like an outfit that has  been washed over and over.  It fades and becomes less special with each wash or each use.  

If you look at books that come out, the first edition of an author is raw, true, and a pure message of what the author wanted to convey.  Then, each new edition becomes less of that message to appeal to new readers, til the novel is old and discarded as being yet another novel of the same mundane, accepted storylines.  People WANT originality.  That is what drew them to the book in the first place.

Herman Melville, author of Moby Dick, said "It is better to fail in originality than to succeed in imitation."  I definitely agree.

You were born with a unique flavor you can present to the world, hungry for creativity and boldness.  If you mute yourself to fit in, what was the point of your birth.  In Beautiful Creatures, the boyfriend of the main character asks her, "You are a miracle.  Why would you ever want to fit in."

So, my challenges to you is to not mute yourself to be a good faded copy of originality but be the original miracle you were born to be.  Acceptance was never the point.

The Lotus Flowers of Providence

 I watched the Odessey movie, last week.  It was done very well.  In one part of it, Odysseus is delayed for years by someone feeding him lotus flowers, which by way of its pleasure caused him to forget and to remain, rather than returning to his wife.

The lotus flower element has been used in several other Greek tales and movies, and it is a good way to illustrate the point I want to make here. I saw a meme, earlier, that said they trusted the timing of the universe or their story or such. It's a cute saying, but it is not only incorrect but will keep you from reaching your goals.

How?  Because, if you enter a mental state where you are not at work in your own life, nothing is happening.  So, people can be sitting there waiting on the universe to do it for them, when all the time they fail to realize they ARE in the universe and are tasked with their own life.  They are the answer waiting to happen.

To echo my recent post, Do the Work, I wanted to be in shape and get fit for decades, til I got discontented and dedicated to get off my but to start doing it.

There is a place for patience, and the universe will respond to your work, but as Benjamin Franklin once said, "God helps those that help themselves."  So, what is the universe waiting for YOU to do for yourself?

Redeeming Others

This post will tap into my theological training a bit, but I do want want to be seen as someone claiming to be better than anyone else.  The only person I seek to be better than is myself every single day.  But, I do want to convey something that has been stirring in my mind and heart about how we approach others.

Can someone be redeemed?  Is it possible for someone, anyone, that has failed to measure up to be restored?  That is a concept that is very popular and spoken about quite a bit.  I do believe that it is possible, but it does not come from speaking the words and poof.. one is redeemed like magic.  It comes about because someone believes they are worthy of restoration and seeks to have it.  

Yet, our society is not practiced in restoration of the flawed.  While everyone wants to believe in redemption for themselves, the average person will not extend the same grace to another that has wronged them... even if they are instructed by Christ, Himself, to do so.

Jesus said that if someone strikes you, you are to turn the other cheek for them to strike.  If they take your coat, give them more clothing, as well.  He tells us to pray for those that despitefully use us.  If I am honest, I used to not like those verses much.  I was a person that was bullied as a youth and have been used by many over my decades.  It felt like weakness to be kind to someone that is not kind, and I do believe that you need to have limits and establish boundaries of how far you go to help othes, or you will find yourself depleted and unable to reach your own goals.  However, I have been thinking more deeply on this, and I see another side to the coin.

When I was studying to be a teacher, we learned that oftentimes those that are the meanest come from homes where they are targeted.  Those that lash out to cause pain are often facing pain.  It's like the lion with the thorn in its paw.  Once removed, they become more kind.

So, what IS Jesus trying to say, here?  I believe he is trying to say that we have the opportunity to either add to their pain or give them a path to redemption... a path to believe they are worthy of love and care and respect in order to rise up.  Those that cause us harm are often hurting from us, as well.  To fuel the conflict is to give them more obstacles to overcome to rise.

I no longer want to be the excuse for anyone to feel unworthy.  I want to help all people to believe in themselves and become the best they can be, no matter their role in my own story.  So, I will let everything from the past go and only look forward to my own potential of joys as I rise.  May others around me feel and do the same.

How to Move Forward

Personal experience. There is a place for mourning and finding acceptance in the crisis stages, but don't get stuck there. There is a time to say the past is the past, and it does not exist in the present.  We are all evolving, and we are changing. I have noted in the past on the blog that who we are as a person seems to reset in much faster periods than in times past.  In 6 months, your reality shifts from where it was in the past.  It does not mean that the past was not worthy of its part in your story.  Quite the contrary.  It was a domino to lead you forward.  However, who YOU are and who others are has so shifted in 6 months that who you remember yourself to be does not exist anymore, and who others are does not, either.

This does run somewhat contrary to my posts about how something was true in the period of history in which it happened and will always be true in that period.  That is true.  But, we all evolve.  We all shift.  I have noted in years past that the best we can hope is that we evolve in the same direction as others in our lives. However, change happens, whether we like it or not.  

So, when you really understand that, you come to understand that anyone you would  blame, no longer exists.  And, the person you would defend, no longer exists.

In theology, there is a distinction between soul and spirit in saying that the soul is our depth and meaning and legacy and personality, which is always changing.  Yet, our spirit is life, and it is always changing... by its very nature.  It is growing and living and becoming and adapting.  It is not permanent but contributes to the permanance.

So, in moving forward, you need to undersand that yesterday is gone.  Treasure or challenge, it does not exist, anymore.  Today, however, is always adaptable to whatever you learn and process and know to be true.  Today, is the canvas of tomorrow.  It will always include elements of the past, but it is always being written... always unfinished til you draw your last breath.

So, the purpose of this post is simply to say, your story is not done.  Don't fight to resurrect the past.  it no longer exists.  Don't hate.  Don't defend.  Don't let the past hold any sway on you at all.  Live today..... LIVE today.  And, let that inform you as you guide your way forward. 

And, tomorrow will result.  I believe in tomorrow, and you will learn it is the entire purpose of life for you.  I know you will find amazing adventures there.

Love Thy Ex

Part of what i believe is my purpose is to address things that others know to be true but is not spoken about in society.  Or, it's something that people don't know to be true but should, because it is obvious.  Or, it could be things that no one has the courage to say.

Whichever category this falls into, tonight's blog post is something that I think is important to note and to change in society.  It has become so common that it is just presumed to be the natural way that relationships end that you will trash your ex in order to move on from them.  I admit that in years past I fell victim to that trend, but it is neither healthy or right to do so.

In the Bible, Jesus tells people to love those that do good to you and to love those that do bad.  If someone strikes your cheek, you are to turn the other cheek.  Jesus forgave his killers from the cross.  So, the Christian message is to forgive those that do you wrong... unless they are you ex, and then all the church gossip says burn that guy or gal.

I have been accused at one time or another by one person or another of still caring for my ex.  If you are talking about as a human being, of course I still do.  I chose them for a reason and care for them in that I do not want them to face harm, just like I don't want anyone else to do so.  I am currently helping an ex and postponing my own needed plans in order to make sure that she is safe until I can leave the situation to pursue my own goals.  Do I still have romantic feelings for her?  No... we have changed, and what I need is different than it once ways.  But, that doesn't mean that I have to hate her for our differences or look over her needs or wish her harm.

So, I will continue to love my ex's in my past and want the best for them.  It doesn't mean that it changes my boundaries or theirs or needs or more.  But, being the same person that I was when I met them and them being a person worthy of care, I will also not be choosing to hurt them intentionally or be saying anything negative about them.  My focus will be on the positive in my own life and my own goals.  I can pursue that going forward without rewriting anything from the past.

So, this runs contrary to the way of modern society, but SOMEONE has to speak up about it, and as is often the case... that person is me.  Have a good weekend.

Rejected and Alone

Let me tap into my core compadres out there in this moment.  Those that have reason to be feeling like they are rejected and alone.  You may be feeling like you have given your all and that wasn't good enough for others.  You may be feeling like your best is never going to be good enough for others that look for something better.  You may be feeling like the world is better without your imput.

First, let me tell you that you are being led by false delusions projected upon you by others that sought another story in being with you.  That isn't your problem to resolve.  What I can tell you is that your life is in YOUR hands, and the worth of it is up to you.  

Next, let me tell you that you do not need someone else to give you purpose.  You were born.  That's your purpose.  You were given the purpose of making your own life meaningful and satisfying.  You were born....period.  Stop trying to find an excuse for why that was true.  The universe felt that it was important for you to happen. So... happen.

If you are feeling alone, part of that is the expectation of society that intrinsically sides with entroverts over introverts  and says if you do not have someone you must be deficient.  The other side is upon you to go find YOUR people.  There is an old quote that says that if a fish is comparing itself to a tree it will spend its whole life feeling it is incomplete.  What you need to understand is that if you are feeling like that all it means is you are in the wrong pond.  In the wrong pond, your best will always be not enough.  So, what you need to do is find the right pond.

So, if you are feeling rejected and alone, I want to tell you that you are being liberated to find those that do resonate with your heart.  It may take time, but you do yourself a disservice to ignore your own needs out of an expected assessment level of bieng "good enough" for anyone.  Keep shining.  The right one will be dazzled by you, and I look forward to the song the universe will hear when you harmonize together.

Charity is Charity

I am someone that has always given much of myself to benefit others, where I saw a need existed.  It was never to check a box to win my way into heaven or to pay for past sins.  It was simply that they had a need, so I gave.  I still believe in giving to needs, even as I am learning to impose limited and boundaries on how much of myself I give away.  Yet, there needs to be focus on one thing that I didn't always undestand and needs to be noted to be true.  Charity is charity.

That may sound like it is obvious, but it has not always been understood by myself or by others, and I think the confusion is shared by many others out there, so I will explain.  

Probably the best way to highlight the error is to describe what charity is NOT.  Charity for meeting the needs of others is not romance or a relationship, either romantic relationship or friendship.  It is just charity meeting a need.  Just because you are helping someone should not be seen by yourself as a romantic act, so if you are in a romance there should be romantic items being done.  Similarly, just because someone is giving to you, receiving it is not a romantic act.  It is receiving charity and should not be seen as romance.  Both of these are true of friendships in their forms of connection, as well.

To echo the beginning of this blog post, I am not saying do not give.  Give, while respecting the boundary of keeping for your own needs and plans.  But, do not confluse doing so as anything more than it is... giving to meet a need.

Do the Work

I was complemented the other day on how fit I am looking, and it is true that I have made some serious progress in my fitness level and appearance over the past 7 months, though I have a ways to go to reach my goals.  But, it didn't happen overnight.  It took commitment to my fitness, even when I didn't feel like it.  It took going out to run, when I was already tired... when I was sore... when the weather was't great... when I didn't have much time.  Yesterday, I wanted to watch the All Star baseball game, which I did.  But, I knew that it was my run day, so I rushed out to get a run in before the game and just barely made it back and showered before the game began.  

It's like the popular meme that is out there that says if it is important to you, you will find a way to make it happen.  If it is not, you will find an excuse.  And, that is true for much more than fitness.  Whatever your goal is, you have to be willing to do the work.  Make the plans that get you to where you want to be.  Then, make daily actions to get you there.  Improvement does not come by accident.  It is often not the natural outcome.  Entropy is the natural outcome of things in nature, which means things fall apart.  They rust, degrade, fade, dry out, and wither away if not maintained.  If you want them to remain, it takes work.  Why would you be any different.

So, this is a short blog post to simply say, whatever you want in life, you have to put in the work and take action to get it.  If you are not, you cannot blame anyone else for it not happening.

Small Choices in a Chosen Path

Today, I am back thinking on a concept that I have referenced on here in different blog posts over the months and years... determinism.  It is the belief that there is little free will, because ultimately one thing affects another thing and every moment is the result of the forces of past choices by others, ourselves, and other natural forces and qualities.

It is true that we do have some influence to make some choices along our path.  But, we all do still find ourselves in any given moment with limited options if we want to find what we need.  It reminds me of the movie Serendipity, which I have seen many times.  In one scene, Jonathan is questioning Sara about her belief in destiny, asking if we have no choice in it at all.  She says..

"No, I think we make our own decisions.

I just think that fate sends us little signs,

and it's how we read the signs that determinas whether we're happy or not."

I think that  is a little too absolute, as I do believe that there are different paths that can lead to happiness, but it is true that in any given situation, we can choose to make decisions and do actions that are beneficial to us or worse for us.

 

HOWEVER, those choices that led you to where you make the decision are often influenced by other circumstances and decisions of us or othes, and decisions by others and circumstances will close doors and lead to others.  And, personality types and desires and locations of children and more will influence the other decisions that follow.

Yet, I do not want this to be seen as an entirely negative thing.  There is a beauty to it.  It's science.  We try things and places and people and more.  Things harmonize or they don't.  Social environments appear, and then they leave.  Some remain, and others appear.  And, we keep testing all of our lives, and that is what leads us and guides us in our decisions.

So, I don't have all the answers for my life, primarily because for the largest part of the chapters I am not holding the pen.  But, I do want to play an active part in it, and I look forward to what I may discover in the next one I begin.

Challenging My Emotional Foundations

I noted this on my social media a few days ago and said I would be blogging about it when I had a little more time and mental capacity to do it right.  However, recently, I have been taking aim at my own perceptions from the past in regards to the role of emotions and seeing things differently than I used to see them.

First of all, I want to lead off by saying that I am not saying there is not a place for emotions and romantic gestures and actions by all involved.  I don't believe that a connection without those things is a romantic relationship and could just be friendship.  I am a roommate with someone and am not in a relationship with her.  We handle day to day things by agreement, have conversations, and help each other out from time to time.  None of that makes it a relationship.  And, in a few months I will be moving out, and it will not be taking an emotional tole.  Romantic relationships must have romance in it by both sides.

HOWEVER, to counter the importance of that and my own prior perceptions regarding the role of feelings, I have been asking some hard questions.  Some people will probably agree with my challenge, while others may agree with my old view that I am challenging.  Nevertheless, here we go.

Is it possible that what I felt was true love was actually signs of psychological needs, instead?  And, the feeling of completeness was simply feeling those needs satisfied and not necessarily something mutual?  When I was feeling the need for closeness, was that a sign of not feeling balanced in myself.  When I was wanting support and comlements, was that the need for validation?  When I was changing to please them, was that my fearing loss?

I can go on, and I don't have any answers to this.  But, I am feeling more and more balanced on my own as a single person, lately, and more able to have a happy life on my own.  As I am doing so, I find I have less of those old needs and that makes me wonder if they were actually healthy in a relationship.  I do know that if I get into one in the future, it will look differently.  I will want time on my own to do things on my own without my partner.  I will not be bending my preference all the time but stating it and doing it if I feel the need.  That would be a true partnership, and I feel that is one I am not sure I have ever had.

So, anyways, I wanted to put this out there for others to consider, as well.

Shine and Attract

We have an influence in how we want our lives to look.  That's why observation is important.  That's why boundaries are important.  That's why self love is important.  That's why reason is important.  That's why choices are important.  All of these are blog post themes of mine this year and often in prior years.

A person will show you what they want and how they are.  It's not always a case of good or bad (no one can be only one or the other) but qualities, needs, personality.  You should not expect anything else from them.  If you do, that's on you.  

So, you need to know who YOU are, shine who you are, and be clear to convey what you need and want.  This will weed out difficult periods of finding out someone doesn't actually like you.  Then, in time, someone will see you and be like... FINALLY and pursue you and never let you go.  All you have to do is shine your true you, and the universe will do the rest.

What Do You Have to Lose

I had the idea for this post last night, but I was too tired to put it down into words.  Work has been very busy, lately, and will be for a little while more.  But, the pause allowed me time to see an episode of the new Elle series that fits into it, as well.  So there is my bright side to the dark in that.

Without going into much detail at all, I'll just say that much of my last several years has been very hard and has included a lot of loss.  For the most part, I have kept a positive attitude about it and have seen and wrote about the importance of finding the benefit in the darkness and learning more about yourself.

One of the things that I learned in my years is how much I can overcome, which gives me confidence for each new challenge.  It's like my time in the military, when training puts you under extreme stress, so you learn that you can actually stand on your own and not only survive but thrive.

But, one thing that I have also learned about those dark times of struggle is this... the more that you lose, the less you have to lose.  The less you have to lose, the more you are free to do whatever you want to do for yourself, and that allows you to honestly explore and learn to enjoy who you really are.

In the Elle eposide, she wants to be friends with a girl that asks her why she likes her.  Elle couldn't come up with a reason at that point.  Later, she tells her that she likes that she doesn't care what anyone else thinks and wants her to tell Elle how to do that.

In one part, Elle asks her to bring her her spare outfit, because she had wore the wrong thing to a party and was afraid that she would be the target of laughing and more.  The girl comes to Elle and tells her that she didn't bring the outfit, because she was showing her how to not care.  She tells Elle that at one point she has bought the outfit, because she liked the way that she looked in it and told her to not hide that but to flaunt that, instead.

So, that is my point for this post.  You are you.  You like you.  You may have lost everything like a classic Job tale, or you may just be hiding away yourself.  But, what do you really have to lose... people that don't like you, anyways?  So, own it.  Flaunt it.  Build yourself up from nothing in a way that YOU like, because in the end that is all you need and might be all that will accompany you on your journey the rest of your life.

The Bright Side of The Dark

I think sometimes we miss the opportunity to follow opportunities, because our mindset is still stuck on things out of our control from the past.  When the reality of the situation is that there is a bright side to everyhing, even the things we think is dark.

I think a good way of approaching it is to begin with the statement... if I HAVE to, then... and then follow that statement with a positive alternative or quality.  If I have to exercise to get fit, then I am going to run races and buy workout gear I like.  If I HAVE to work, then I am going to enjoy my paycheck.  If I have to be single, I am going to enjoy my single life.  If a situation or environment not pleasant, there are so many ways to change that, as well.

In any moment of our lives, we choose our perspective and our response.  What does it benefit us to think on things that are lost, when we can use that same time to prepare for what is to come.  I know that some things and people were important in the past, and those memories are good to have.  I love my time with my kids, for example.  And, there could be happy days with them in the future, as well.  But, right now, they are not present.  So, if I HAVE to live that reality, I am going to enjoy my days on my own, til and if they are part of the story, again.

Life happens, and so much of that life is out of our hands.  But, there is so much that is in our power to affect and do, as well.  So, whatever has happened in your life that might feel dark only makes it easier to see and follow the light, until you find your own bright side of life.  And, I hope you love where it takes you.

Let Freedom Ring

This weekend, I celebrate freedom, as the holiday was designed to do.  As such I celebrate all kinds of freedom, including the kinds that are at threat of control by many of those that are celebrating it loudest.

I celebrate the freedom to choose your own faith, which was a freedom sought by many of our first founders. That faith can be non Christian or no faith at all.  You are free to choose to believe whatever you like.

I celebrate the freedom to say what you want to say without getting approval from someone else, including the freedom to speak out against the current government without facing penalty.

I celebrate the freedom to love who you want to love and choose your own romantic partner or to choose to live without one.  You can have children or choose not to have children.  

I celebrate the freedom to read what I want and watch what I want, even if it is spicy and to enjoy my own body or the body of someone else that also chooses it, as well.  And, we would be free to decide what that means.

I celebrate the freedom to drink alcohol and have fun or to sit at home and do a puzzle if I am so inclined... including the freedom to do that instead of watching fireworks because I might not be feeling it under the current regime.

Whatever you choose to do with your life or whatever you choose to do for this weekend, I celebrate that you still have the freedom to choose it,  yourself.

Thank You

 You wouldn't think it would be important to note, but it is important and has been for many decades and centuries.  My only hope is that is can be seen differently in the future.

One thing that I have seen so often in the past but is something that is never noted by others, because it is religiously incorrect is that people often thank the wrong person...

Lets assume a hypothetical situation where someone has done something for another person.  It is a man doing something for a woman.  The woman, however, says that it is something that God is doing for her.  So, she gives God all the credit for the good that was done for her.  And, she says that God blessed her with that thing, even though it was done by the man.

However, later, the man does things that were not as pleasant.  Those thing cannot be blamed to God, so they are blamed to the man.  And, so... God gets the credit for all the good, but man gets the blame for all the bad.

When, if we looked at it from the perspective of reality, the good was done by a man that wanted to do good, and the bad was done by a man that was human.

I know that this post will not be accepted or understood by most that read it, but it must be done, nonetheless.  

For a moment, imagine there is no heaven as the beatles says.  For a moment, consider that all there is is humans.  Consider that we all make mistakes and are growing.  Then, realize that  life is not about what others give to us but what grace we allow to others for what we desire for ourselves.

For myself, I am grateful for all the good that others have broubght into my life, and I do not give that gratitude to God but to them, even as I do not attributte their choices to a devil but to them as well.

So, to summarize, thank you for the good that has come into my life, whatever the source, to the source from which it came.  And, I will grow from what has happened in my life to greater points of gratitude.

Futility

I saw a good quote, today,  by Michael Jordan, that says, "To learn to succeed, you must first learn to fail." I think that is a very good quote, but I think it is probably misunderstood by most that read it.

In order to learn how to fail, you have to be willing to admit something is a failure.  You have to admit that you have something to learn and to admit that what you did did not accomplish what you set out to accomplish.  Then, after that honest assessment, you need to accept constructive criticism, which... to be fair was not my strong suit in all my elementary school report cards... and to grow from it.

As I have matured, I am mu more willing to accept such criticism and to grow, not because I am broken and have no will left but because I recognized the futulity of it all.

There is a scene in a Matrix movie where Neo is talking with an elder, and he faults them for not being willing to take action to actually fix anything, because the elders sees a wider view of things and are driven by less passion.

Especially in the last years of my life, so far, I have realized that there is a lot of things in our lives that we never really had control to change.  It reminds me of the dterminism theory that is illustrated in the Devs series, but basically in the end it is just the half of the serenity prayer that says may I accept the things I cannot change.

We should take ownership of our lives and responsibility for them and do all that we need to do to enjoy those days, but part of doing that is to realize when a path or a choice is not fulfilling what we desire and to alter our course upon learning it.

In the Army, I was a gun driver in a howitzer, before I became a first sargent driver.  In that position, we would move to a location and then shoot and then learn from our failure how we needed to adjust to hit the target.  If we were unwilling to admit that we failed, we would spend all our time failing and potentially setting ourselves up for risk.  So, it is important to admit when something is futile.

So, as you proceed towards happiness, be willing to admit when avenues do not lead there and be willing to adjust your trajectory to get there, or you will fail to hit your mark and the only blame you can have for that is failing to learn.