Forward to Happiness

I’m going to break from my only non romantic happiness theme, as I have been reconsidering romance as a future reality, lately again.  I think it is a human need… whether or not that is marriage or long term.  I had a dream days ago where I was close to a faceless woman.. emotionally.. and it reminded me how nice that is. There used to be an app called Hot or Not… Tinder pretty much replaced that as that’s pretty much all that app is about.. physical.  It is superficial and controlling, but the name fits with what I wanted to talk about. I spent years in both of my marriages over my life trying yo get my wife to show romantic interest in me.  I’m sure it had a lot to do with who I chose.. usually those that liked it when I showed them attention.  In the end, that would be the sum of the relationship for them, and when I pulled my level of emotional display back to theirs, it was the end of their interest, because that was all it had to it.  Not ironically, ...

The other day I made the comment on my social media that it is astonishing to me that in two years we have come from a point when even the rich was begging for government aid to stay afloat and everyone chanting that all we need is love and such to a point where those that don't own a house or have a huge savings are considered lazy and losers, once again.... in just two short years.  I, actually, have a lot more background and thoughts that can go into this, so I am doing a post about it. In Oklahoma where I grew up, there isn't a lot of opportunity.. for ANYONE for jobs and such.  It is pretty much an unremarkable rural state, because you could see that same type of community in a couple dozen other states, nationwide.  People grew up in simple lives.  We didn't know we were poor by national standards, because.. it was that it was.  That's what we knew when we grew up.  It was just... life.  It would be years before I would be introduced to faster pa...

The other day, I saw a post on FB that was talking about how so much of our lives are driven by our reactions to negative things that happen in our days but that science shows we also have positive reactions to things that happen, too.  The more we look for and focus on those positive things, the happier our days will be.  Indeed.  It’s easy to get caught up in what we lack and miss the happy moments we can have in what we have. I spent several hours last night watching an old show I used to watch… NCIS but this isn’t about that.  As I was watching it, I was thinking of the person I was when I was watching it… and other shows like it.  For much of that time, I was in marriages that were one sided and would end badly.  But… in MY mind the issue of finding my mate was over, and my mind was free to just be happy with OTHER things.  Indeed, in those years I HAD to find happiness in other things, as I was not finding much of it in the relationship.  It...

 I deleted my “relationships detox” post.  I think it still contains many truths, and it is important to create your own happiness.  We shouldn’t expect a relationship to solve all our problems or make us happy.  Instead, we should BRING happiness into all our relationships, and that includes much more than romantic ones.   Someone told me months ago that “a friendship is a relationship” .. I needed to hear that then and still important to remember, today.  Indeed, the only thing in my mind that makes a relationship WORK is if there is a friendship there, as well.  And, should I live my life without a romantic one but giving and receiving friendship love my whole life, I would be the most blessed and happy version of my life, rather than walking around bitter that it’s not happening to me.   I don’t want to cloud up that point, so I’ll just end it here with that.  Be happy.. then make other happy.  Don’t worry about whether you’re single...