Focus on the Good

 "Don't cry because it's over, smile because it happened.” - Dr Seuss

This quote is something that I have had a lot of experience with in the past with regards to my wonderful time raising my kids.  Those memories are etched forever in time, pics, and my mind, as well as Facebook memories, very often.  It also applies to my wonderful romance of this year.  Though that is over, it was objectively one of the best times of my life, and I will forever be grateful for the opportunity to have experienced it.  I gained so much and changed so much in my experience with her that I will carry with me into my future paths.  I hope to maintain a connection to her to have future grand memories in the future, as friends as well.  

 However, as I reflected on it all over the past weeks, I realized something that is true by extension.  There is something good to maintain from so much of our lives that we often just sweep under the rug, because those relationships, connections, locations, and more have passed out of our minds.  This week I watched The Arrival, because I remembered the plot that has similarities to Interstellar, as well.  Time passes, and we feel that reality flows with it.  So, if something is not in the present, we conclude those things are no longer worthy or true or real.  We often mourn the loss of those things.  There is some real motivation for the mourning, because we no longer will be experiencing those things.  However, that moment.. those times... had value.  We were happy in them and did grow from them.

I am not saying that they should have remained.  Some things go and some things remain.  Some things just change.  Everyone is responsible for their own path, and no one should be judged for how they choose to live it.  Some people in our past were intentionally harmful to us, and that is something that definitely should not remain.  But, I can think of good experiences and times in each of the states I have lived and with many of the friends I had over those times that were lost to distance, distractions, political differences, and more.

It is easy to feel that your life was either good or bad by focusing on different elements of your past.  If you only look at the outcome of things, it will tend towards bad, because those things have ended.  But, if you focus on the good moments, even in the things that no longer remain, your life can be seen as full of joy.

So, that is my challenge to myself and one that I would give to you.  As things change and hardships come, look for the good.. not only in what remains but what happened along the way.  Be proud of yourself for taking changes and the joys you brought into the lives of others.  Smile at the good chapters in your story, and take faith in yourself that happy chapters will happen, again.