Forward to Happiness

I normally don't do posts about things until I have reached a conclusion.  That conclusion might be updated in the future, but it is usually being based upon what I think to be true.  This one will be a little different, because I have questions about a way of life that I think deserves questioning that I used to believe to be true.  So, this will be a kinda open ended discussion that questions my path a little and reactions that I have had to others. I was raised Christian... and by that I don't mean like Christ but as society deemed Christianity to be.  The two don't always coincide.  Anyway, I was taught that you should always "turn the other cheek" or "be the bigger person" as the other person that did you wrong would always get theirs in the end or face justice, and you would be blessed for doing so. So, I can point to dozens of examples of my giving up things, time, and stress for those that would ultimately discard me, move on from me, or attack m...

Do you know... for a VERY long time until relatively recently, it was possible for a family of even a dozen kids to exist on one income?  In fact,  it was considered poor form for both parents to work.  I disagree with that and welcome gender equality to share responsibility .. but shouldn't that mean an abundance of extra money?  Now, two person households are strapped, and many wives live trapped in bad households.. or men.. because as I've experienced it is almost impossible for a single person to live on one income, even in poor housing.. IF they can get that housing at all without the credit of a wealthier person. In 2020, I went to live in Florida to be near my child, after a divorce.  I was already poor from selling my house for a marriage that would fail and my car for medical bills and more of someone that would reject me.  But, then, I would face Florida expenses.  And... for 4 years I would have to work VERY long hours to barely stay above r...

It's not a novel or original concept for this blog post, but I think I often omit or don't do some things in blogs upon which I rely, simply because in my mind it's something that people already know, even if they in fact often don't... as the old truths of prior generations are not conveyed, always, to younger generations and younger generations in this cancel culture are not interested in what older generations would tell them, leading us toward a society where they will have to learn them for themselves and then judge the older generations for not telling them what they didn't want to hear. One of those lessons I will write about, today.  Consider a bird.  At some point, the parent bird will push the young bird out of the nest to force the bird to use and gain confidence not in someone else to save them but in confidence of their own wings. I have, unfortunately... or maybe fortunately.. had a lot of experience in this over my life in my personal struggles.  But,...

Today, I was driving on my deliveries, and I thought of something that is a worthy counter point to my logical and analytical approach to things, lately.  First, I must say that my focus on reason and logic has been and is a steady influence in the face of a lot of disorder and things that could cause fear, if it was allowed.  So, I am grateful for the reasoned approach and will let it continue to guide my decision making for the most part.  That said, there is a counter point to be said that is true in its own right. As I was driving, I was enjoying looking around at the building and more that I have seen for a long time, prior to returning, here.  It's not just the memories.  It's familiarity and a personal connection to those roads and places and such.  But, as I was driving and looking, it occurred to me that if you DIDN'T have the memories and my preferences and more, it could just be seen as a run down city in places and a building that I think has qu...

 There is an exchange in Beautiful Creatures that I think is a great way to lead off this post.  I'm going to try to get the quote right, because I don't have the movie in front of me and can't find the quote online... Ethan: You don't have anything to do with the devil, do you? Lena: That is such a mortal thing to say. Ethan: There is evil, Lena. Lena: Of course there is evil casters.  The difference is we didn't create a devil to blame for it. Does the devil exist?  Personally, I think so, albeit probably not much like is portrayed in the tradition of men.  But, the question is valid, because no one has ever seen the devil in a physical form.  You'd think so with all the way most churches today are singing about waging war on Satan and his followers. First of all, it wouldn't make sense demons "follow" anyone.. if they rejected God by tradition, why would they follow someone projected to be worse?  But, I digress. So, where do we SEE the acts of ...

Resisting the urge to angrily blast my ex for what she's done, I'll do a quick synopsis of facts only and then change to a more healthy use of that anger both in blogs and my life. Synopsis: my ex, diagnosed with Biopolar Manic Depressive Mania mixed with some Schizophrenia paranoid delusions after writing all over herself and the walls and talking gibberish back in 2006 and has lost primary custody of her children in the court for it in the past, has... after my innocence of letting her have primary custody in 2020, defied court custody by blocking my custody time and berated me to my children for months to turn them away from me to the point that on father's day weekend I learned I no longer have any contact  ..one day after my child turned 18, so I can't sue.  That's not me attacking her.  That's simply me recounting history she'd rather not have said.  Needless to say, definitely made the right choice leaving her in 14 years ago and moving away from her ...

I wanted to pick up and continue the Dark Light post theme from several posts back.  And, no.. I do not plan to use this post to address the most recent actions of my ex, even though it certainly qualifies.  I'm keeping this more of a general post, as it actually applies to many things in my life and the lives of others, so I won't cheaper it by making it singular.  It's something I've been wanting to post for a few weeks, so.. here goes. The saying is that Light is revealing and darkness fears the light.  I've found the reverse to actually be more true in reality.  Does that sound odd?  You might be saying... how can darkness reveal something, if it is dark?  Actually, it does is very effectively. Consider... you enter a relationship and money is flowing and gifts are coming and all is well, and you KNOW the other person loves you... til the money stops flowing or time is limited or more. Pressure rises, and they turn on you or run away.  Darknes...

I've been thinking for a bit that I wanted to do a lesson post for young men based on my successes and failures over the years... more failures than successes.  So, here goes.. This post will cover different areas of life, but I want to start with interaction with women, because that will be on the minds of most young men.  The advice will be from experience and not the general advice you see out there, because I don't think that advice is very helpful being sanitized to only be the things people say and repeat and not the actual effective advice.  And, it won't necessarily align with what I've said over the years,  as I have learned along the way. The first thing you need to recognize is that men and women are not the same.  I'm not talking about sex vs gender here.  I'm a big proponent of transgender people, so take my "men" and "women" to reflect to those genders chosen.. regardless of sex.  If you feel it is uneven what you give vs what y...

Do you know what I think is the unifying factor in mant of our mental and emotional problems that we have today?  Indeed, I'd say most of them and financial and other problems, as well.  I think it is the expectation of perfection.  It is the perfect enemy... because the enemy is being perfect. Someone is depressed about their body.  What is the enemy... perfection.  Someone is depressed about their income or family structure or clothing or really anything.  What is the enemy... perfection. This stretches into the realm of diversity in that someone has an image in their head about how others should look or feel or act.  When they confront many that do not look or feel or act like the perfect stereotype, they are bothered.  Is it the person doing something against them?  No.. it's just not that person's perfect society view. We are not made to be perfect.  Indeed, the Bible Christians use says it is not possible to be perfect.  ALL a...

 I had the thought of doing this post, earlier today, but I forgot for a bit.  So, doing it now. I was in the National Guard for 8 years and active duty for 2 years.  I definitely have reservations about how our military is being used, but I want to focus on one aspect of the military that most don't spend enough time learning from... Basic Training. The purpose of basic training is to break you down and build you up with individual confidence.  You enter basic scared and alone.  I remember my moments doing it.  I was gathered with a bunch of others that are also scared and alone.  They joined out of different reasons.  Some joined for scholarship money.  Some joined for family tradition.  Some.. actually.. joined after a life of prison to find a new future for themselves.  However, none were prepared for what lie ahead. The first two weeks of Basic are called hell weeks.  For weeks you are woke at ungodly hours of the morning ...

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 It's been an eventful week.  But, it's finally starting to settle down, so I thought it would be a good time to do my next blog post. I was driving from Florida to Tulsa as part of my move and staying in 2 hotels along the way. For most it was uneventful and steady. The last day , however , I began within ten to fifteen minutes of driving of having an overheating radiator.  I drove it to a nearby bait shop in the sparsely populated Arkansas road. The man in the bait shop said I could use in water hose at the back of his store to fill up my radiator. So I filled it up and I drove it to the next town where I bought several gallons of water.  It wasn't a huge leak.  I was able to drive 60 to 70 miles before I put in another three quarters gallon of water. But it got me all the way The way to tulsa to be able to check in on time at my new residence.  Then I was able to start figuring out how I was going to fix the car.  Having had to fix the car at all me...