Be True to You

I want to step back to note something I noted weeks ago and has not ceased to be true but was not the most recent focus.  I was covering it, back when I was talking about boundaries a lot, and I think it bears repeating.  One of the first things that you need to do is take time to learn about yourself and what you need, and then you need to establish limits upon yourself to make sure you fulfill those needs.. and that is called setting boundaries upon yourself.  Sometimes, that is boundaries to preserve your money or your time.  However, if you did take the time to learn about yourself, those boundaries must keep those realities in mind.

I have spent a lot of time talking about improving yourself in recent weeks, as I have been making strides in that process, myself.  However, there is a difference between becoming the best YOU that you can be and becoming someone else's dream of what they would like you to be for them.  If you were to go down that path and curtail your own neeeds just to gain favor of someone else or set aside your needs for the wants or needs of others, you would find yourself right back into the same house of cards that has so often collapsed, in your past.

For example, I have been focusing on reason and logic and the brain to guide your steps, and that is a much more successful guide than emotions that can lead you astray.  HOWEVER, that has not and will not change the fact that in any romantic relationship that I will have, there must be an open exchange of emotions and flirting and care and more, or I would see no reason to be in such a relationship.  My focus on reason is not a substitute or acceptable alternative to me.  It is a guard to move me forward UNTIL such time as I feel safe to open up to what I truly desire.  I will not drop that guard, until that time and location so presents itself.  Until then, I will focus on other needs and see them done.

So, this blog post is a reminder that the first place to start in recovering and rebuilding your life is to first determine what it is that you need to be happy.  Then, you make step by step moves in a plan to get you to where you can find a good foundation in yourself, be balanced and happy on your own, and wait til and if something comes along that does meet your needs.  To do anything else is just to repeat broken cycles that lead you to the same outcomes, again and again.