To Thine Own Self Be True

The popular Shakespeare quotation "to thine own self be true" has valid and important meaning in being true to who you are, despite the pressure to be something else to others.  However, I think that it could have a different meaning that is perhaps more important.  To paraphrase it, as if it were a modern day translation of the Bible that paraphrases passages into common language style, I think you could say that you need to be REAL with yourself.

I've recently decided to get more active on dating apps and in pursuit of a relationship, again.  I don't say that the period of self focus wasn't important.  I think it was VERY important and is something that anyone should do to find personal balance and love for self, before entering into a relationship.  However, I was sitting at home one night, and I reflected on my life over the period of my being single.  Very often, my focus was on the past or on myself or on my growth,  How should I view the past, I questioned and ultimately decided to accept it as the good and the bad that it was, appreciate and learn from it (including my own mistakes) and to move on from it.  

However, the bigger realization that hit me was that in all that time of personal reflection, there was no one sending me messages of concern when I was in a storm or just because they thought of me.  No one was sending romantic messages or flirting in any way.  I had friends and family but no romance in my life... and I realized that I missed romance.  I missed being romantic and being romanced.  I missed the spark of interest and exploration, mixed with the pit in your stomach of risk of vulnerability.  Yes.. I missed even that, and none of it has been happening.  Being real.. or true.. to myself is admitting both that I desire it and that it is not happening.  Even my own attempts at the past were refused, which might have been a good thing, anyways.  So, as the basic laws of science would tell us, things at rest stay at rest, unless a force acts upon it to ... move.  If nothing happens.. nothing happens.  And, so I am beginning.

I will not chronicle my dating adventures, but I did think it was important to note the beginning, because I believe too many are still so focused on the past that they are missing out of what can happen in the present or the future, and I love myself enough to not let that happen with my potential for happiness.

So, be real with yourself, and look forward to what may be.  As I have noted and quoted from time to time from Beautiful Creatures, "Anything is better than a life standing still."  Good luck in your own adventures.  May we all find joy in our paths as we venture forth.