Positive Realism

When I was young, I used to rush into things or out of things or moving or more.  I was led by my emotions, and it sometimes left me broke and having to create solutions for my own choices.  There are still times that I rush, but in recent years I am trying to take my time and make reasoned and planned out steps, and it is leading to more respect and better outcomes.

In the past I have noted this, but I learned to love turtles in Florida and taking your time.  What I discovered in driving Florida streets was that if you slow down, the others that are rushing will go around you.  You don't have to match their speed.  They will just move past, leaving you in peace.  When you realize that, the stress of feeling rushed can disappear.  You control your own pace and life.

Slowing things down and making reasoned steps can be frustrating at times, because you really want to be there.. to fulfill your goals and live in your plans.  However, I am finding there are a lot of benefits to taking your time.  Just like above, you don't feel the stress of trying to make it happen out of thin air and do not have to pick up the pieces after a rash move.  It also gives you time to identify the best timing and method of making things happen and to not only get there but get there prepared to BE there.

Some will think that taking your time lacks committment or shows doubt.  However, it is just being realistic, and being real with yourself is very important.  Not all avenues willl work to get you to your destination, or not all timing will either.  Failing to be real will lead to loss.  Paths or timing that do not work may seem like a negative thing, but it is just information.  Information is important to plan correctly, and planning is key to making things work, if you can combine realisim with determined positive goals and not negative self criticism.  

So, take your time.  Hope is not in a rush.  You are.  Learn to enjoy the journey and make careful steps.  I think you will find much more success in your journey if you do.

Light in Dark

I was sitting in my office, today, listening to people pack up their things on the day they were fired.  I have worked at the government, and like many thousands that was a doomed venture from the start, even if we had no way of knowing that upon taking the job... as everyone with less than a year of service was either fired or took a resignation deal like I took.  However, the experience dove tails into my recent thoughts of things that people need to remember in this time and about which i wanted to say.  So, I'll use it to illustrate some points.

So, back to my listening and observation of these individuals' final day.  I heard some with the most anger and most sad reactions being the same ones that over the last weeks was heard spouting the most unrealistic hopeful delusions.  I'm not anti hope.  I'm a hopeful person, but life has taught me to temper that with clear vision.  I've also been in relationships where I thought someone cared but was really just my own projection of what I desired to be true.  Like those let go at work, the truth DOES eventually make itself known.  You can either ignore the dark notes in the story and be side swiped, or you can recognize the uncomfortable truths and make proper decisions... which is why I'm not losing pay after today like them, but I'll have a smoother path to my next employment.  It is often the most deluded that ends up with the deepest pains.

Change is inevitable.  It doesn't mean a bad thing that something changed.  It means you have to adapt and adjust.  Life changes all the time, and those most likely to be happy are those able to be happy IN the middle of the change or the struggles.  If you are waiting for everything to be perfect or even peaceful around you, you miss out on a lot of good, and that good can help you have peace in other areas.  Like... my job is changing, the President is a dictator destroying the country, and ... yet... I'm living the happiest loving relationship of my life, right now.  That love gives me peace to deal with the rest.  So, look for the happy moments and happy futures to give you fuel for the other things in your life. 

Similarly, you have to realize that you're probably not going to get your ideal outcomes in all areas of your life.  Some may be or feel that good.  Cherish those.  However, my experience has been you often have to just do the best you can do.  And, the best you can do is... the best you can do.  Stop comparing it to your unrealistic outcome hopes.   Like... my taking the resignation offer wasn't a choice between resigning or a job.  If I didn't take it, I'd have been fired, today.  So, comparing it to a job that continues was NEVER in the cards, even if I didn't realize it upon taking the job.  

The best you can do is the best you can do.  So, stop lamenting that which was never going to happen and take pride in yourself that you made it through another day in the best possible way you knew to do it.  Your living the best outcome you can, if you choose wisely.  Look forward and look up.  Tomorrow is a new day.  Make it one worthy of your participation and end in the happiness that you can find along the journey.